Tuesday, December 30, 2008

I wonder were the Christmas spirit went this year because it didn't visit my world. I wonder if there are any spirits left. Since my mother passed away the world just seems grey and boring =(.

Kinda need a new screen for my pc. Thinking of dell's S2309W with full HD resolution. We got one at work and it looks good and the picture is crystal clear.

Have been having hard time to sleep since gf went on her holyday with her parents. Kinga hard to be totally alone again after spending so much time together. =( Miss her greatly. Especially in the current season and mood.

I am kinda living my dream right now with work and such. Not sure were to head further down this path. Hopefully i will stay with my current work for a long time and be part of some greater development then what we are doing now but who knows. We are working hard to devliver top notch stuff but if we dont get enough attention and customers we will have a hard time anyway so that part of my future is kinda insecure but not effecting me greatly due to my beilves that i have the world at the palm of my hand so to speak.

Found a new tv series today called merlin. Good stuff wish thay would make more fantasy series. There are so many great fantasy books out there that span over 10 volumes or more and would be more suitble for series then for movies. Good example of this is The lord of the rings vs harry potter. Lord of the rings was cut down greatly but still 3 long movies to 3 books. But when you get up to harry potter movies there are 7 books and probobly 7 or 8 movies total. And it becomes a much harder workfor the producer to keep the books true story while still having the major plot spanning all books going. So when we look at larger books my best guess is to make a few lengthy series of them instead.

Look at Wheel of time a book series that span over 13 volumes including New spring and thay have gone out saying thay are goign to make 1 possible 3 movies from that. How can thay possible fit all that content into 3 movies unless the movies are 12 hours long each?
I am very afraid that thay will tear apart and make a new "Eragon" movie.

Eragon the book was ok almost good. But the movie really sucked, just wanted my cash back when i went to see it on the movie theaters.

btw have so many subjects i want to talk about so many discussions i want to have with well informed people. I wonder were i can find such people or people with as broad intrests as me.

anyway logging off this mindless early morning. Kinda disslike goign to bed atm so easly get caught up in stuff to keep me from going to bed like writing this blog post.

anyway, off i am

Thursday, October 16, 2008

I am living my dream..Almost...

I am starting to fullfill the dreams I have had for quite a while, though I cant say since I was a little boy due to the fact that my dreams have partly changed over the years especially since the introduction of a computorised society.

Though I have always had tons of dreams and tons of stuff i want to do. Maby really should make a big fat checklist Of what i want to do and start workign on it. But right now time is not really aviable to me and wont really be untill after next summer due to current work.

For a long time now I have had an idea to give my self an challange each year to learn somthing new and put it into practice to explore my self and the world around me. But havnt really gotten around to start it. Maby next year. Already know what that challange would be ( beyound my weightproblems ) .

The "sacrefices" for some of my dreams to come through has been though and something i will have to live with for the rest of my life. Mainly thinking of the loss of my mother.

She passed away recently in breast cancer that spread so it has been a rocky road for me and my brothers the past few months. Not much to do then accept and mourn. I really hope she knows how much we love her and how much we miss her.

From my part of the inheritance the insurance company left us children I was able to make the 10% deposit on the appartment I now live in.

On top of this i have also made my dream work. Meaning I am working as a programmer for a small company with good social structure.

Also now my girlfriend has moved in with my and it seems life cant get better but it can. If I would be able to put the effort into losing some weight to life would be even better.

Meh useless rambling no special thoughs just some kind of red string of dreams in this topic. I promise I will better my self and write of somthing of more importance then me in the future.

Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Diffrent day diffrent life!

A friend asked me how to make a comedy, crime, horror, thriller type of movie so this is just a short short synopsis of that movie =)

p1: "You know once there was a bellman....."
p2: "Contracts his face in horror"
p3: "Stealth guy comes along and shoots p2 in the head over p1 shoulder"
p1: " Hay i was telling a joke here!!"
cop: *looks at the crime scene* "Someone has been murdered here"...

Blah i can tell now that my weight loss plans didn't follow through started out well. But i will do it some day some time. But making life altering changes on one self is very very hard.

Much has happened since last i posted and i dont want to go into all now. But current status is OK.

And while i am at it. If someone could spare me their EEEPC i could have use for it typing game design on the bus from home to work. So i wouldn't mind taking it off your hands. =9

Thursday, January 24, 2008

Time for me to move on to my next life!

Today ill begin my next life.
That is Focusing on eating controlled get some more exercise and just take it easy with candy and stuff.

Eat normal supper today. About 500kcal. my stomache feels full not used to get tha tmuch food now. hehe it was a tad much but ill keept it at that.

I can also say that i feel so much better. And i really hope this will give better results. i kinda want to loose 50kg. to weight about 100 would be very nice.

Anyway this is it for me today. Take care.


Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Lazy =(

Bah i am to lazy updating this blog. I also starting to think that maby i should update this blog with entries conting somthing else then weight and life stuff.

Any suggestions?

I have soooo much to say about everything but i am way to lazy to actually say it or discuss it with people.

I have an sin to confess.
I am addicted to Pepsi Max.
Yesterday i was out of pepsi and since this month has been harsh economic wise i didnt have cash.
I could feel my body screen for pepsi. Its kinda creepy. But now i have some more pepsi so now i am happy again.

I do have lots of problems and lots of wants but i donno what to do with it. =(

Bah no order this post today sorry about that.

I feel weird.
I feel lonly.
I feel stressed.
I feel happy.
I feel unsecure.
I feel my obsession for knowledge.

What to dooo what to doo *running around with hands on head*

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Harsh harsh

It has been very harsh this =( Lost controll a few times becouse i actually wanted to chew somthing. Also the saturday went bad. Beought both 200g Marabou Milkchocolate And 100g Hearts snacks. And it kinda feels like my body is screeming after a pizza or somthing like that.
But i guess i really need to focus. Extend the diet a few days becouse of the cheeting.

Anyway i have started to feel the effects of the diet though. Had some dizziness probobly becouse of the low calorie intake.
On the positive side i have notised that some cloths dosnt sit that tight on me anymore.
I really hope i can get the controll over my habits i need from this. Also gonna need to create a nice schedual over my food after this diet. I think i will continue to take the nutrition drinks as inbetween food becouse of my other problems i find this a good solution. While exchanging breakfast dinner and supper for real food in controlled amount.

Anyway i dream of a better body i dream of a better life. I dream of beeing able to wear the cloths i like and not just choose what fits the best.

The goal is a weightloss of about 50kg so that i weight about 90-100kg. And the keep my weight at that.

Future plans is also to start workign out more as soon as I start on normal food again.

Anyway this is it for me today.


Tuesday, January 8, 2008

Its an start not THE start.

Ok so today is the first day for the rest of my life not that it feel any diffrent.
It didnt start out good but it did start out.
Bad stuff:
No breakfast
2 Billy's Panpizzas for lunch
Bought WHITE bread ( one filled with flour and suger )

Good stuff
VLCD box so i can start with that for todays dinner.

So currenty i get 4 bad points and 1 good point.

Some might say that VLCD is a bad thing too but I dont see it that way
I see it like a kickstart. Some help for me to get the controll over what i eat.
So that i can later exchange some portions of it for real food with an controlled amount
of calories and such.

Anyway like i said in the topic it isnt the best start but its an start.


Current Status
Bad: 4
Good: 1

Monday, January 7, 2008

Old life out new life in!

Today is the last day of my old life and tomorrow my new life will begin.
I will use this blog for support for the comming months and maby just maby the rest of my life.

And i really hope for support with this. The goal?

Longterm goal is to loose weight enough to shop in normal clothing stores again.
Short tearm goal about 5kg a month.
One might ask how?
More walking less food ( Been eating larger portions of food then i needed )
More controll over food.
Candy and sweets only on saturday and only small amounts.

Since loosing weight aint about cutting of everthing but change the way you live i am not just stopping eating bad stuff.

One other of my major problems is that i dont eat vegetables. I am currently on vitamin pills. Not sure how will work this out. I guess with hard work and good friends or somthing.

Anyway like I said today is the last day for this. Since the Christmas holydays is over and such i will try to make this year and every following year much better!

More info soon along with pictures.

Thanx for tuning in Blakhouse Channel.


also if you happend to have an apartment in malmö eller lund ( sweden) for rent i am very intrested =)